Aaahh!!! Real Monsters VS Strategy Guide

 

Happy October everyone! I originally covered this series last year in my Analysis of my favorite character, Oblina. But I figured now that it's spooky season all over again, it’s high time I dug this gem back up and celebrated my favorite time of the year by breaking down this whole boogie woogie world! Here’s how to be OP in Aaahh!!! Real Monsters!

Town Tier:

So here we have the primary tier of this series, something I like to call The Monster Tier, populated by pretty much the entire main cast of ghouls and goblins themselves! Characters in this tier are well into the Kiloton range, scaling off Krumm’s feats of sucking in a 20 mile oil spill in about a second, they can physically travel to other continents in minutes for hypersonic speed, although some members can react to and fly a Space Shuttle, which would be Massively Hypersonic reaction time, so this will be the limit for counters. The Characters in this tier are monsters, creatures spawned from the primordial fear humans possess of the unknown. They are a varied and grotesque, often cannibalistic species without much defined traits. They live in dumps, graveyards, sewers and other places humans naturally avoid, and consume garbage and pollution. These Monsters go out of their way to journey into human society and scare people, as mankind's collective belief in and fear of monsters maintains their existence. Monsters have a wide variety of abilities and come in all different shapes and sizes, with very little uniform traits connecting them because everyone's idea of a monster is somewhat different. Generally, Monsters possess incredibly powerful Fear Aura’s which are so potent they defy the laws of reality, enabling them to literally scare away their own shadows, make inanimate objects jump away from them, allow paralyzed humans to run away in terror, and drive those exposed completely insane. Monsters also tend to have extremely malleable bodies, they are able to shapeshift, alter their own size, manipulate their hardness, detach their own body parts and control them like a hivemind, change colors and regenerate from anything that doesn’t completely destroy their form. Monsters are also ancient entities that are all casually hundreds-thousands of years old, they are completely immune to toxins and the cold, and are capable of rapidly traversing through toilets. Monsters like Krumm are able to produce a foul smelling Noxious Gas powerful enough to kill plant life, collapse a circus tent and send crowds of people fleeing in terror, it can even reveal infrared lasers. Many Monsters are logia creatures, made of materials such as slime or even shadows to shrug off attacks, some can even use attack reflection abilities like The Shroink’s burps. There's also a suite of Mental Plane hax that monsters have, which allows them to enter into humans dreams and attack them, cause nightmares and hallucinations, directly hypnotize foes, and even crawl inside their brain and possess them. Monsters are also super intelligent, with even relatively average ones like Ickis able to build a working satellite TV out of garbage in an afternoon, and more advanced ones actually making a machine that can project one's thoughts like a movie. Other noteworthy powers some monsters have shown include shooting fire balls, flight and levitation, spatial manipulation, and the ability to Fuse things together or separate them at will. Monsters can have super senses able to detect everything in the surrounding environment through stench, possess enough stealth to sneak through buildings under constant video surveillance, and unlike humans, have no fear of things they don’t understand. Plus if all that wasn’t enough, The Gromble actually owns a legendary clock that can allow the user to rewind or stop time.

So what counter strategies would function well here? Monsters have fairly high Stealth and intelligence, as well as stamina with characters like Oblina being able to function for 10 straight days without rest, but very few monsters possess decent ranged attacks so bombardment would be a fair tactic to employ. Most monsters aren’t particularly skilled fighters either, being roughly average human level at it, and still fearing animals like dogs, which they refer to as bark & bites. This seems only natural for creatures that live in the shadows and rely on fear. Monsters have very resilient bodies, especially by human standards making them difficult to take down, but they don’t have any defense against higher plane attacks like soul manipulation and mind control. But some of their biggest weaknesses are their official ones, for example, Monsters are immune to everything toxic to humans and animals, however things like soap, perfume, beautiful music, healthy food and anything else fresh, clean or pure is toxic and deadly to them. Even the very fresh air can suffocate them, hence monsters actually fill an air sack in their body with Pollution from their home, which will allow them to breathe in the open air for up to a week before refueling. But one of their biggest weaknesses comes from their nature themselves. As the physical personification of Mankind's primordial fears, if humans in large numbers stop believing in them, or fearing them, monsters will literally begin being erased from existence.

One counter For this verse I think could work, 

Mysterio:

Mysterio from Marvel Comics would do perfectly here, he may not be able to compete with the Monsters of this tier in raw stats, but that hasn’t stopped him from being a dangerous foe to the stronger and faster Spider-Man. This is because Mysterio is a total Master of illusions and perception manipulation, making people believe he is a mighty sorcerer. Mysterio’s Illusions are potent enough to completely fool someone into believing pretty much anything he wants, affecting all 5 main senses, as well as some side ones like ones kinesthetic sense and even superpowers like the Spider-Sense. When you consider that he can also teleport on top of that, the monsters of this tier would have No Idea where he actually is to attack, and he could easily make them attack each other on a whim. Mysterio is essentially what happens if the Monsters sacrificed their physical stats to go ALL in on their mental suites potency, allowing him to hypnotise great numbers of foes alike into believing whatever he says, meaning he could convince monsters they are suffocating, or even use it on a large amount of humans and make them not believe in monsters regardless of evidence to weaken them. He also packs Lasers that move at light speed and can moderately damage Spider-Man, which should be able to take care of a monster here if he needs to. Still he has a risk of getting tagged by a lucky hit from a monster, for a more safe bet.

Charlotte:

Yup, Charlotte from Making Fiends! Charlotte is on physical par with Vendetta who can tank explosions enough to violently shake all the buildings in a city block, and could react to flying out of the atmosphere, which would make her weaker than the monsters at this tier, but more than able to keep up in speed. Like Vendetta, Charlotte is partially a mental plane entity who is able to regenerate herself from the mental plane. Not only does this mean that Charlotte would be impossible to physically kill, but she would be able to resist the entire Mental Hax suite that monsters can use, due to having a sentient mental plane self, who was not able to be mind haxed by Vendetta in similar fashion. She also has powers like extrasensory perception and teleportation which would allow her to track monsters wherever they go, and her tendency to sing stupid happy songs wherever she goes will directly harm the monsters. Charlotte would be totally immune to the fear aura and scare tactics that monsters employee due to her ironclad belief that everything in the universe is good natured, which has allowed her to resist being afraid of any of Vendetta’s terrifying Fiends, and actually rehabilitate some of them into being kind creatures. And furthermore, would likely try to advocate that people shouldn’t be afraid of monsters and they are actually nice and cute, which obviously will reduce the level of fear people have of their kind. Still, Charlotte is not nearly as intelligent as them and potentially could be tricked by the monsters, for a perfect counter, one could always go with,

Kalifa:

Kalifa from One Piece would be an actual Nightmare for any Monsters to face. Via scaling to an early Sanji, Kalifa is town level and can dodge lightning and electricity, putting her on relative par with the Monsters in stats. Kalifa’s primary abilities revolve around what is known as Cleanliness Manipulation, which allows her to ‘wipe clean’ everyone and everything around her, not only removing all dirt, odor and filth, but sapping away their very strength of her foe. Normally the latter part of that would be the dangerous part, but here, her ability to wipe the monsters and their surroundings would horrendously burn and poison their bodies, and would even clean the pollution out of their air sacks causing them to suffocate. Kalifa can also create Soap Armor around herself that would effectively prevent any monster from being able to land an attack on her without being exposed to the deadly suds, and that's on top of being a master martial artist who could easily out skill them in a bout. As a user of Observation Haki, Kalifa would be able to detect any monsters in the area, rendering their stealth useless, and can control water, bubbles and air to use as a cleaning distance attack giving her superior range. Also thanks to her soap also reducing an enemies friction levels, The Gromble likely wouldn’t even be able to activate his time clock even if he tried to use that on her. Not only do I Think Kalifa would be able to beat any monster in a fight, but she could easily capture one in a bubble orb and use her influence to bring it into the public eye. Once Humans study and understand monsters, they will stop being afraid of them, it’s the whole reason Bigfoot is a criminal there, he’s a monster people got evidence of.

Large Planet Tier:

Ya’know, this really should be a single tier verse but I just have to talk about how inexplicably broken the humans are in this verse, completely in the background of the Monsters adventures. The Human’s of ARM have developed Technology strong enough to crash into Saturn’s rings at Faster than light speeds and shatter them to pieces, and missiles that can violently break the moon to pieces. Other than that, this tier has a fair deal of magic user humans, who can make entire spatial dimensions, as well as portals to travel around or BFR people. Ghosts also exist in this verse, which are passively invisible and intangible, and can attack using slime.

So who would work to counter this tier?

Leroy:

Leroy the 629th experiment from the Lilo & Stitch series, designed to be essentially a better version of Stitch. Leroy is strong enough to defeat any other experiment at the time in 1 on 1 combat, and even relatively unimpressive experiments can tank the shockwave of 2 planets colliding and out speed lightning. With power like that Leroy could overtake any human tech head to head. Leroy is also a supreme master of martial arts and stealth, complete with having potent super senses, a brain that works faster than a supercomputer, and resistance to all forms of mind manipulation. He was also able to capture every other experiment that existed at the time, including portal creators, ones that can turn invisible, and Phantasmo the intangible ghost experiment, meaning he can hit the astral plane. His only real weakness is the failsafe in his code that causes him to instantly die upon hearing the song Aloha Oe, unlikely as that may be, another suggestion would be.

Constanze Amalie von Braunschbank-Albrechtsberger

Constanze from Little Witch Academia! Constanze scales to the same Continent Level, Relativistic feats of Akko, meaning she could be oneshot by some of the tech, but is just as fast so could very well dodge. Constanze is a master of Magitech, the art of combining science and magic to make deadly new devices. She is very arguably the most intelligent character in her entire series, and surpasses the super geniuses of this verse, including Simon the monster Hunter. With that in mind, Constanze could easily hack into any technology they try to use against her, and turn it back to sender. And that’s in addition to all the stuff she already has in her kit, including teleportation and flight, giving her a massive mobility advantage. And hax like transmutation to one shot pretty much anything. Constanze can also hit ghosts so casually that she literally hunts them for sport, meaning nothing is safe from her. That said, if you are still nervous about them scoring a lucky hit…

Hisako

You can always go with Hisako from Killer Instinct. Hisako was amped by the dark energies of Gargos when he was destroyed, meaning she scales to his feat of flying into the Earth’s atmosphere at Mach 19,000 and dispersing away a cloud covering all of North America, requiring Planetary Levels of Energy. Hisako is a Onryō, an extremely dangerous type of Japanese ghost who is both incorporeal and intangible, yet is still able to hit on the physical plane. This means that she can effectively attack and destroy anyone in this verse, but only the ghosts have a chance at hitting her back. That’s also unlikely to happen as Hisako is significantly more skilled in combat than basically anyone in the series, and also has the ability to teleport, which makes hitting her even more complex. Hisako can also possess beings and machinery to turn members or weapons of the verse on itself, as well as banish things to hell with her power, both of which this series has no counterplay to.

Verse Material Analysis: Theonite

 

In the world of Skullgirls, there exists a mysterious and powerful element known as Theonite. This crystal-like substance has existed long before mankind, yet is only slightly more common than meteorites, leaving a surprising amount about the substance unknown. So what IS, Theonite; where does it come from; what can it be used for; and how dangerous is it? Today I will be answering all of this by going over all the data that I have gathered.

Theonite in short, is the byproduct of the Divine Powers of the Goddess Trinity, made up of the Sister gods of Spacetime, Venus and Aeon, and their all powerful Mother, that takes the form of a crystal that maintains some of their power. It was first introduced on Earth thousands of years ago during the Skullgirls equivalent of Ancient Egypt. At this time the Goddess Trinity existed in the world in mortal form and the Theonite that resulted from their power created a race of immortal, sentient creatures with magical abilities known as Theon. 

These Theon were made of Theonite and could bond to hosts to grant them power in exchange for nutrients, members of this race included Samson, Leviathan and Sekhmet, among others. Wanting the gods power for herself, the Theon, Sekhmet, and her host Murdered the sister gods human forms. Unbelievably enraged by this, the Mother Goddess laid waste to the entire kingdom, and left the earth behind, never allowing herself or her daughters to reincarnate there. Theon have been referred to only as Parasites ever since.

But this wouldn’t be the last time Theonite was leaked into Earth. As punishment for betraying them, Venus and Aeon created The Skull Heart, which every Seven Years would turn the peoples own selfishness against them by creating powerful destructive beings known as Skullgirls to devastate the planet. This Skull Heart is made entirely of Theonite just like modern parasites, and every time it unleashed a Skullgirl it leaked more and more Theonite into the world, making it a rare, but renewable resource.

Naturally, like any resource, it has been used and experimented with by the various dominant species’ of this world. In ancient times it was forged by special weapon smiths into semi-sentiment tools known as ‘Living Weapons’ to be used in combat. And in modern times it has been studied by ASG, who used it as a power source to create powerful Skullgirl combating soldiers, make Anti-Skullgirl Weapons and Gadgets, and even a slew of artificial ‘Synthetic Parasites’ to make a whole new generation of super-powered hosts to stop Skullgirls. And that’s our History Lesson on the substance, so let’s break down what it is capable of.

Theonite is a divine and Reality Warping Element, SO potentially powerful, that a small amount of it was able to cause a Multiversal Crisis, that nearly Destroyed Infinite Timelines. Also since it’s so heavily connected to The Trinity, Skullgirls, Parasites, Living Weapons and ASG Tech, it is incredibly versatile and Very Few characters in the series don’t rely on it in some way.

Just like the Goddesses it comes from, Theonite has immense influence over space and time, it allows characters like Squigly and Peacock to create and destroy space itself, teleport, create portals, and travel to other dimensions. It halted Annie’s aging so that she never grows older, is used by Isaac to travel through time, and lets Peacock and Valentine Stop Time completely. Theonite also exists not only physically, but Astrally, Mentally and Absolutely, and is able to hit things on all of these planes of existence. It is the source of the soul destruction abilities of Skullgirls and Squigly, the Soul Hax Resistance of Skullgirls and the Soul Contamination of Synthetic Parasites. Theonite is responsible for Brain Drain’s mental powers, it can be used to control minds, restore or destroy memories, and create illusions. It also allows characters like Skullgirls, Peacock and Robo-Fortune to see the 4th wall and interact with Metafiction just like the gods. Theonite has massive regeneration abilities, allowing the Skull Heart to recreate itself from total destruction, and grants several users of it impressive healing factors. It can raise entire armies from the dead, cure poison, resist mind control and absorption, and allow someone to create matter and even life out of only their thoughts. Things using Theonite have been able to molecularly manipulate objects, or straight transmute things altogether. It can summon or control the elements, such as Earth, Fire, Electricity, Acid and Darkness. Users of it can have Flight and Telekinesis, create powerful explosions, shapeshift and fire energy blasts. It also can be used for Incredible detection abilities, enough to sense someone's entire character and history, or detect everything on a city wide basis through sight, smell and hearing. Speaking of hearing, it can manipulate sound, to use as an attack, or even allow a user to turn into sound waves as a means of travel. It also has Death Manipulation powers, and is able to drain or absorb energy and blood. It can even warp reality to give Painwheel a normal life again, or curse Annie to never be able to utter a swear word.

Name: Theonite

Origin: Skullgirls

Classification: Element, Crystal, Divine Artifact

Uses: Powersource, Magic Tool, Weapon

Threat Level: HIGH Multiversal

Capabilities: Spacetime Manipulation, Effects Physical, Astral, Mental and Absolute Planes, Regeneration, Death Manipulation, Elemental Control, General Reality Warping, Various Other Powers

Prevalence: Rare

Just to give some Points of Comparison I found Interesting:

If you put Theonite in DC Comics it would be VERY hectic for the story, this is an element that could cause a crisis on par with the COIE if used by ANYONE with level 3 or higher intellect, and thus would be fairly sought after by villains and heroes alike to use or contain respectively. It could easily be used to quickly give lots of people powers, although it cannot give powers directly, it can make tools and beings that grant such. It would be interesting to retroactively incorporate it, have it be the source of numerous random magic artifacts that weren’t well explained before.

Blazblue has most of the Fighters draw from an energy called Seither so I thought it would be interesting to compare those. Seither is basically MUCH more prevalent than Theonite, being the result of the dead Black Beast, it exists basically everywhere on Earth floating around as invisible particles. Beings in Blazblue also use surrounding Seither rather than directly having it in their own bodies or weapons. Seither is far more versatile than Theonite in regards to its insane lists of hax and resistances. However it does lack potency compared to Theonite, it cannot threaten an Infinite Multiverse, and also cannot affect the Metafictional plane.

Lastly, I think the most direct comparison I can make to Theonite is Energy X from Freedom Force. Like Theonite it is a Multiverse Threatening Divine Energy source that leaked into Earth and is responsible for the superpowers of Nearly the entire cast of Heroes and Villains. The Primary Differences are that Energy X directly goes into people and grants them superhuman powers, whereas Theonite needs to be done through use of a tool, parasite or artifact. It would be really interesting to me to think about swapping Energy X for Theonite in these two series and think of ways you could try to give the characters similar powers despite these differences.

Death Battle Analysis: Beowulf

 

Ladies and Gentlemen, it’s time... It’s Time... IT”S BEOWULF TIME!!! 

That’s Right We are Finally Back to Skullgirls after a long hiatus, covering one of the most beloved characters in the franchise, it’s Wulfamania up in here as the Wulf himself graces my blogs with his presence! It’s High Time we broke down the Awesomeness that Is the one, The Only, Beowulf!

Background: 

During the early days of the Grand War between the Canopy Kingdom and the surrounding nations, Beowulf was the world champion wrestler of the New Meridian Onslaught, or NMO Wrestling division. In the middle of this war, The Canopy Kingdom and the Gigan Nation agreed to have an Exhibition match.

Beowulf, the Canopy Kingdom’s champion, would battle it out against the strongest warrior of the Gigan Nation, Grendel, in a no holds barred, anything goes, battle for the ages. While it sounded cool on paper, the battle was actually extremely one sided, With Grendel being about 30 feet tall and beyond human in every regard.

But to the shock of everyone watching, Beowulf against all odds managed to Defeat Grendel, tearing his left arm off, and killing him with a piledriver into the ground. Enraged by this, Grendel’s mother lashed out and attacked Beowulf to get revenge, but she too was no match for his might. 

That day history was made, not just for the NMO, but for the kingdom as a whole. Beowulf became a national icon, a hero and inspiration to the people of the Canopy Kingdom, known for his Wulfpack of fans and having actionfigures no one could live without.

But after the war, his fame petered out. Beowulf’s fame led to him taking up commercial deals that after his loss in popularity as war propaganda, ended up going nowhere, his last appearance in media being as the villain on the popular magical girl series, Annie: The Girl of the Stars, before he retired completely.

Hating inactivity and being forgotten, Beowulf was unsatisfied with his retired lifestyle, and dreamed of getting back into the ring to reclaim his former glory and beloved hobby of wrestling.

One day, Grendel’s Arm, which Beowulf had mounted on his wall as a trophy, suddenly came to life and attacked him. A New Skullgirl had risen in New Meridian and was on the attack. 

This inspired Beowulf to finally come outta retirement, to take down the Skullgirl and become the nation's Hero Again!

So Beowulf called up his sleazy old agent Zane, who got him back into the ring and had him go out and ‘protect the people from all the freaks that come outta the woodwork when the Skullgirl arrives’ saying that they would capture all the fights on camera’s.

Except, Zane was actually having Beowulf beat up ASG Agents and other warriors that would stop the Skullgirl, and clearly wasn’t filming any of it.

Eventually it led to some bizarre mirror match where he had to fight another Beowulf, who in-front of all his fans, Revealed a truth that even Beowulf didn’t know, his fight with Grendel was Rigged. It was the first and only joint effort between the Royal Family and the Medici Mob, Drugging Grendel before the fight. How else could Grendel’s elderly mother put up more of a fight than a warrior in his prime? But Beowulf refused to fall into shame because of this, he swore that day to fix this and make it up to everyone, even Grendel.

Beowulf marched right back to Zane to tell him off and that….Didn’t quite work out.

Zane was actually Double, a Shapeshifting Monster who works for the Skull Heart, who had used Beowulf to defeat and capture those who wish to do it harm. She sought to destroy Beowulf too, but he managed to hold her off until they could be rescued by Annie.

Now being aware of his mistakes, Beowulf finally decided to fight the Skullgirl and make amends for his mistakes even if it cost him his life. But the Skullgirl would not be his biggest challenge.

Marie used her powers to fully resurrect Grendel from the dead at his prime from his arm. Literally forcing the demons of Beowulf’s past back to bite him.

Beowulf and Grendel squared off as equals, ready to settle this for real the way all warriors do.

With the determination of an Epic Hero, Beowulf managed to repeat the very attack from the battle he was so famous for, totally legit this time, cementing him again as the hero he was always meant to be, and saving the world from the Skullgirl.

And as a fitting reward, Beowulf was brought back onto Annie: The Girl of the Stars, only this time, he got to play a hero again like he always wanted.

Personality:

Beowulf is an excitable, hot-blooded, and extremely genuine person who wears his heart on his sleeve. He craves action, excitement and being a hero that everyone of his fans can look up too. He loves his work, has a heart of gold, and always tries his hardest to keep his promises and do right by everyone. 

He’s a little bumbling, brash and sometimes reckless, but he legitimately cares a great deal for his fans, a good person who is quick to forgive. He likes Hunting, working, sweaters, tour buses, boots, ladders, fluorescent light tubes, contracts that guarantee money, microbrews, merchandise, chamomile tea and the sound of an excited crowd. His dislikes include Professional writing staffs, refined sugar, Allen keys, snakes, disqualifications, taking vacation time, spray on tans, indoor voices, being told what to do, being told what to wear and potatoes.

Intellect/Skill:

As far as raw intelligence goes, Beowulf is commonly described as being kinda an idiot. While he’s not dumb per-say, he is known to be a bit of a meathead who makes quick and brash decisions without thinking them through. He’s been shown to be quite gullible and easy to manipulate, both by Double and the organizers of his Grendel fight alike. He often overestimates his abilities and gets in way over his head. That said, he does always learn from his mistakes and comes back stronger from them.

Skill wise on the other hand, Beowulf is off the charts and very arguably the most skilled fighter in the entire Skullgirls series somehow. He uses a Rushdown-Grappler Combo fighting style, striking foes repeatedly with punches, kicks, knees and headbutts, and pulling in close for powerful grabs, throws and deadly piledrivers. Beowulf is the World Heavyweight Champion in the NMO division, with an undefeated record. A very interesting thing about this is that in the NMO, Beowulf is classified as a Cruiserweight Wrestler, the 2nd lightest weight class in professional wrestling. Beowulf stands 6’7 and weighs 287 pounds, in real life, that would easily classify him as a Super Heavyweight Wrestler, the 2nd heaviest weight class. The reason he's stuck in cruiser is because the NMO allows in giant races of other species to compete which massively eclipse Beowulf in size, but still, none of them could beat him.

But let's talk about Gigans, Gigans are the largest species in the Skullgirls world, a race of giant humanoid monsters more than double the size of an elephant. They are considered the most powerful creatures on the planet excluding the Skullgirl herself.

Even the genius Valentine, who fought in the Grand War and had a great deal of experience fighting Gigans, believed it absolutely impossible for any human (Beowulf included) to beat one one on one, and she said this to Beowulf immediately after he kicked her butt in a fight. Yet in Beowulf’s fair, even rematch with the world champion Gigan fighter Grendel, he was able to defeat him all over again through his own impressive combat skill. To give a bit of Skill Tiering, Parasoul, the elite warrior princess who trains black ops soldiers and mastered numerous different types of weapons combat styles, was only barely able to subdue a Gigan-Human Halfbreed lady, Beowulf fought likely the strongest Gigan in the world and killed him.

Powers:

• Wulf Blitzer:

One of Beowulf’s most signature martial arts techniques, probably learned at the same school that Jon Talbain went to, is the Wulf Blitzer. With this ability, Beowulf is able to straight up fly through the air for notable distances in any direction, and can use it up to 3 times in rapid succession. The ability also surrounds his body in a damaging aura that allows him to slam into opponents like a meteorite.

• Hype:

Like all Pro Wrestlers, Beowulf draws power from the pure Hype of the spectators watching his battles. By using his signature taunts or epic howl, he can rally up the crowd, and gain a temporary boost in speed, finesse and stamina to perform significantly more elaborate and damaging combo attacks. After Gathering enough Hype he can use the move Wulfamania, which stuns the opponent and allows him to absolutely whale on them for several seconds.

• Hammerspace:

Beowulf seems to store a large amount of gear he uses in combat in some unseen pocket dimension he can pull objects from. This includes a large metal garbage can, an unlimited supply of microphones to drop, jugs of milk, his wrestling championship belt which he can use as a shield, and Grendel’s Arm, which is significantly larger than his whole body.

• Energy Manipulation:

Beowulf also seems to be able to manipulate some form of orange energy that can be used to damage foes with heavier attacks, form energy constructs, and make some pretty cool effects on the screen to add a layer of flare to his wrestling style.

• Metafictional Manipulation:

Beowulf’s most dangerous power however, is his Metafictional Manipulation. Beowulf is able to physically grab and touch the Absolute Plane, which is where you can touch things that are more REAL than you, and supersedes all other layers of existence, including concepts. This basically means Beowulf can physically touch and harm characters, regardless of if they are intangible, a disembodied consciousness, a conceptual entity, or a cartoon character. Although Beowulf’s most common use of this ability is to rip metafictional holes into the background of environments, effectively creating a portal he can travel through. This would allow him to teleport literally anywhere in his series, and potentially BFR characters into the metafictional realm.

Weapons:

• The Hurting:

Beowulf’s primary weapon is an absolute staple of Professional Wrestling, a shiny metal folding chair, which Beowulf affectionately named ‘The Hurting’. Beowulf is incredibly skilled at using this chair as a weapon, able to beat people senseless with it in numerous awesome melee attacks, shield himself from strikes, and even kick or throw it across the screen as a highly damaging ranged attack.

When not in use, Beowulf will store the chair on his back using a special powerful magnet that is attached to the back of his Belt.

And Thanks to a recent Buff, Beowulf is now able to remotely summon The Hurting back to himself after it’s thrown, most likely by using this magnet. Which means now he can effectively throw a giant folding chair like a boomerang.

• Grendal’s Arm:

Beowulf’s other primary weapon is Grendel’s severed arm, which he took as a trophy from his fallen foe, this titanic arm is 120 inches (3.05 Meters) long, allowing Beowulf to pull it out from nowhere for wide sweeping hits that cover almost the whole screen.

When the Skullgirl awoke, her control over the dead Animated Grendel’s Arm back to life, symbolically making his old foe into his partner in combat.

With the arm alive again, it is now able to both move around like a regular arm of its own will and hit with the full awesome power of a mighty Gigan warrior. Beowulf move ‘Gigantic Arm’ where he lets the arm directly punch the opponent, is the most damaging single strike in his moveset.

• Tuscan Milk:

Beowulf also carries gallons of Tuscan Milk which he can somehow chug the entirety of in less than a single second. This seems to give him a short boost in power and energy manipulation abilities.

Feats:

DC/Durability:

• So one thing to quickly point out is Beowulf’s physical lifting strength. It is one of the highest of any of the verse! Beowulf fought against Grendel whose arm is 120 inches long. This is 5 times the length of the average man’s arm, which means Grendel himself would proportionally be 5 times as tall, 5 times as wide, and 5 times as thick as the average man, making him overall 125 times the size of a person. The Average weight for 125 men would be over 25,000 pounds (11340 kg), and Grendel, as a professional athlete of his kind, likely weighs well in excess of this. Yet Beowulf was able to lift him over his head, hold him upside down behind his back and jump high into the air with this to kill him.

• Backing this up, another character on the Skullgirls roster, Big Band, weighs 5000 pounds. Yet by game mechanics, Beowulf is able to casually lift him off the ground with one arm, and jump 8 feet backwards into the air and do a backflip while still holding him.

• Striking Strength however is a much more impressive story, Beowulf was able to battle and defeat the Skullgirl in his timeline, and furthermore he directly defeated Valentine, who canonically dealt damage to the Skullgirl in the prequel mobile story mode, which is canon to all the timelines. This Skullgirl is named Marie, and She once ripped the top half of Medici Tower off its structure and hurled it into the bay. Medici Tower is easily the largest building in New Meridian, 

which includes the The River King Casino, a building that despite reaching past the clouds, isn’t even visible on the city's skyline. In real life the shortest building that can potentially reach the clouds is the Q1 building in Australia, which is 1,058 feet tall, there are less than 100 buildings in real life that can top this, the tallest building in the world being under 3 times this. But Medici Tower is so much larger than the Casino that you cannot even see the latter in a picture of the former. Making it significantly larger than any real life building in the world. Speaking of New Meridian by the way, It's Big, like Enormous even. New Meridian is the largest city in the Canopy Kingdom, to the point where even the Official Canon Info Thread refers to it as a ‘Megacity’, it is stated that New Meridian is actually an entire former country that was known as the Meridian Empire, that was since conquered and annexed by the Canopy Kingdom. Since The Medici Tower rests at the center of this country-city, and Marie threw it all the way into the bay, traveling over the entire district of Little Innsmouth along the way, we can estimate the kinetic energy of this to be over 8 Megatons of TNT.

• Is able to cause violent earthquakes in the surrounding area just with the shockwaves of his physical blows.

Speed:

• Beowulf was fast enough to grab onto Annie of the Stars as she flew by him while rescuing all the captured characters from Doubles Gehenna Dimension.

Gehenna is a large dimension that contains the former capital city of an advanced Ancient Kingdom that Eliza hails from.

Yet Annie was able to fly through it and rescue everyone in only a couple seconds.

• Beowulf was also able to battle and defeat both Valentine and Painwheel in one on one combat, Valentine of which is able to effortlessly dodge point blank machine gun fire.

Painwheel on the other hand is able to jump up into the air and perform 5 different wide sweeping attacks before she begins to fall again, which would require speeds exceeding mach 11.

General:

• Has a fantastic Win-Loss record, having Defeated Cerebella, Painwheel, Big Band, Valentine and Double, while only ever Losing against Annie.

• In his Fight with Double, he defeated her inside of her own Gehenna Dimension, where literally the environment itself is made up of her.

• Defeated Double as an evil copy of himself.

• Became a Hero Again.

Summary: 

Advantages:

• City Level DC/Durability.

• Hypersonic Speed.

• Extremely High Fighting Skill.

• Flight.

• Energy Aura and Manipulation.

• Pocket Dimension.

• Sentient Weaponry.

• Gains Power from Hype.

• Metafictional Attacks and Manipulation.

• Metafictional Portal Creation.

• The Chair!

Disadvantages:

• Gullible.

• Brash.

• Lacks good ranged attacks.

• Extremely un-stealthy.

• Gets a lot of noise complaints.

Recommended Opponent:

Denmark:

I think a pretty good matchup for Beowulf is Denmark from the Hetalia series. They two are obviously very good on thematics with both being charismatic viking warriors known for their strength and power. Both characters are normally really hard to fight due to Beowulf’s metafictional attacks, and Denmark being a conceptual entity, but that actually works out really well because it means they have picture perfect ways to harm each other and it ends up being a very close fight as a result.

Next Time: