Death Battle Analysis: Michael Myers

Happy October Everyone! Ah I love this time of the year, it's a time of Epic Pranks, a diet on Cider and Candy until physical illness and spending free time watching Classic Horror Movies! Wait.. Some of you don't do that? Then you've been doing something wrong! :)

Anyway, in celebration of my favorite time of the year. I will be doing this blog about one of the most iconic horror film slashers of all time! Michael Myers... And let me tell you when this trick-or-treater puts on his mask, and hits the streets, HE'S NOT OUT FOR CANDY!

Background

Michael Audrey Myers was born in Haddonfield Illinois, a normal average American suburb, on October 19th 1957. Michael was born to Donald and Edith Myers, completely normal loving parents, and Michael himself was a perfectly normal boy for his whole early childhood. Then, randomly out of nowhere, on the ominous night of Halloween 1963, a 6 year old Michael went upstairs in his clown costume to the room of his teenage sister Judith and mercilessly stabbed her to death. 

Then calmly walked downstairs and into the front yard where he waited for his parents and the police to collect him. Myers was then taken to Smith's Grove Sanitarium where he was assigned to his psychiatrist, Dr. Sam Loomis.

Under the guise of Catatonia, Michael fooled everyone at the sanitarium into thinking he was a mute, unmoving and near-unconsciousness nut, that is except Loomis.

Michael waited there staring at a wall never saying a word. Though he was not seeing a wall, he was looking past it, looking forward to the night when he would come home. Michael's powers and drive is actually the result of the Cult of Thorn, whose insignia he bears on his arm.

Thorn put a curse upon Michael to turn him into a pure uncorrupted ancient evil driven to kill his entire bloodline as part of their pagan ritual of Samhain. Thorn represented a demon that spread sickness and death to hundreds of thousands of people. According to Celtic legend one child from each tribe was chosen to be inflicted with the curse of thorn, to offer the blood sacrifices of its next of kin on the night of Samhain. The Sacrifice of one family meant sparing the lives of the rest of the tribe. In addition to the Supernatural powers the curse granted Michael, he also gained an intense Rage that drives him to murder his family members, and shall one day destroy him.

The Thorn Druids symbol is formed by a constellation of stars, which only appears periodically on Halloween night. Not only is this what differentiates Samhain from a normal Halloween, it is the one thing that connects all Michaels' killing sprees. 15 years after being committed to Smith's Grove, Michael turned 21, and was sentenced to be tried as an adult, but when they arrived at Smith's Grove, they found that all the patients had been let out. In the confusion, Michael escaped, stole a van and drove all the way back to Haddonfield with the intent to kill his secret younger sister, Laurie Strode.

Michael killed several people that night before being warded off by Dr. Loomis, however Michael is not so easily stopped and has since come back for more and more increasingly insane murder sprees over a 23 year period.

Michael has consistently shown he is a superhuman serial killer, and near immortal Boogyman, that deserves to be feared. He will not stop until every member of his family is dead, and will not hesitate to murder anything that stands in his way.

"Samhain isn't evil spirits. It isn't goblins, ghosts or witches. It's the unconscious mind. We're all afraid of the dark inside ourselves."
-Dr. Loomis

Personality

Michael is as dedicated to frightening his victims as he is to killing them, and will often stalk a person long before even attempting to murder them. He enjoys positioning bodies to be discovered by later victims and chooses to chase them at a clam fast paced walk as opposed to running. He doesn't have very many defining traits, being more a cold blank slate that one can't get a read on but he is clearly conscious of his actions. Michael has displayed traits of curiosity, anger but most of all he is susceptible to confusion and emotional attachment, which has allowed his would be victims to get the better of him in the past.

Intelligence

Despite being locked in a mental asylum since he was 6 years old Michael Myers is one smart cookie. He somehow possesses full knowledge of how to operate and drive a car, to the point where he cannot be differentiated from other motorists. He is an extremely calculative killer, removing chances of escape to ensure his victim's fate, he Blocks Exits before revealing himself, creates traps, cuts the phone lines, and once even took out the entire power grid. Michael is also skilled at using his surroundings to his advantage, and he has used Halloween costumes to impersonate people he’s “taken care of” in order to get the drop on more victims. Although to be honest, if my friends didn’t notice I suddenly became short, mute and creepy as f*ck, I’d say they deserve what's coming to them. Michael is skilled in misdirection, evident by when he caused a commotion in one location to lure the police away from his intended target. He is also practically an escape artist, and has a great sense of direction and tracking.

Most impressively, in the end of Halloween H2O, Michael played le-switcharoo with a Metic to avoid capture and subsequent decapitation by his sister, crushing the poor man's larynx so he couldn't speak and then even straight up framed a dude for his murders to keep secret the fact that he is at large.

Weaponry

Now while it is no secret that Michael Myers is the kind of killer to use Anything as a weapon, he does have a favorite. Michael's weapon of choice is a razor sharp Kitchen Knife with a whopping 16 inch blade,

this Knife has proven quit trusty over the years, Michael generally holds it point down for powerful stabs, with the blade sticking forward to also allow for slashing.

Michael possesses the strength and skill to decapitate people with his Knife, however, as I previously stated, Myers is clearly willing to implement Anything in his killings.

Michael’s secondary weapons include hammers, scalpels, crowbars, large rocks, scissors, cords, rakes, a surgical saw, pitchforks, scythes, vehicles, and a small axe.

Powers/Skills

Height: 5’10

Weight: 167 lbs

Age: 45 (as of Resurrection)
Michael Myers Curse has granted him several powers and skills that have crafted him into a perfect killing machine. 

His most famous ability being his potent healing factor that enables him to near instantly regenerate normally fatal injuries and even entire organs. He was once shot in both eyes and it only resulted in temporary blindness. Some of his more impressive feats involve him shrugging off being shot through the torso hundreds of times at once by a heavily armed firing squad, having his head beaten to a pulp by a heavy metal pipe and burned to a crisp in a fiery explosion and coming out with no tissue damage. 

Apart from healing Myers possesses some form of fear based mental projection commonly known as 'The Shape' this allows Michael to terrify those he is coming after by making them see him everywhere and around every corner and even in their dreams as a terrifying apparition. He also uses this power to track down his primary target wherever they go. In the skill's department Michael is an absolute master of stealth, he seems to move completely inaudibly, constantly hiding in the shadows and striking at the perfect moment as if he is perfectly predicting their moves like some sort of demonic boogeyman. Michael is also an amazing tracker.

Feats

Speed:

• Despite tending to walk slowly like a badass, Michael can casually keep up with and catch people who are sprinting from him
• He was able to catch up to and climb on a speeding truck driving away from his neighborhood at high speed

Strength:

• Impaled through a human body and the wall behind her with a gun barrel
• He can lift full adult humans with one hand no problem, some of them 250+ lbs men, and can support himself and others with just one arm.
• Managed to steal a the rather large gravestone of his sister Judith, and carried it several miles to his home
• He has punched straight through and torn apart hardwood doors
• Smashed through multiple hard wooden and plexiglass doors with the sheer force of his walk
• Jammed his thumb through persons skull
• He’s shattered the human skull with bare hands multiple times
• Tore off a person's head, and twisted a head completely around with his bare hands
  
• Chucked a dude over 30 feet
• Literally pressed a guys head through steel bars
• Pushed down steel cage door

Durability:

• Was hit head-on by a speeding pickup truck and was fine
• Survived a massive car accident that fell off a bridge
• He is unaffected by boiling water, electricity, and being kicked in the crotch
  
• He managed to remain intact after being in the epicenter of a large fiery gas explosion that busted a whole room

General:

• Has accumulated a total kill count of over 115 people plus 4 dogs
• When Michael began his attack on Haddonfield he single-handedly wiped out the entire police force
• Was to die in the fiery explosion, but hell wouldn’t have him
• Somehow climbed a tree with a dead body wrapped in a string of lights and secured it there while at a crowded festival, without anyone noticing
• He eventually succeeded in Killing Jamie Lloyd, Dr. Loomis and Laurie Strode
• He was never actually killed in any of his movies

Weaknesses

Despite being a Pure Evil Boogyman, that doesn't mean unstoppable, Michael has a history of being easily confused or distracted, especially when people remind him who he is. He is weak to sedatives, and despite never dying in a movie, he is not invincible, the means of killing him via explosions and decapitation are heavily implied to do the trick, As Michael had to Avoid these to Survive rather than Tanking them. ...And he got his ass kicked by kung-fu buster rhymes...

Summary

Advantages

• Small Building Level
• Superhuman Speed
• Mid Level Regeneration
• Notably Intelligent
• Master Stealth Skills
• Illusion Powers and some Psychic connections
• Much Experience
• Great Endurance
• THE BEST THEME MUSIC EVER!

Disadvantages

• Doesn't Know Martial Arts
• Can Get Distracted
• Can be Stopped With Enough Brute Force

Recommended Opponents:

Jason Voorhees

Do I really need to Explain this? Michael and Jason are uncannily similar characters and have had an arch-rivalry for over 3 decades! Both have killed well over 100 people, both are the biggest names in slasher films, both have super strength, and are effectively immortal, both never say a word, both position bodies, both wear masks etc etc. Damn, this rivalry is older than Robocop vs Terminator, and is so important to horror fans. For the specifics of this fight, I would recommend Human Jason, AKA parts 1-4, as its the most fair for both sides.

Next Time